Here’s the thing…I don’t really like roses. Don’t get me wrong, they are lovely. But if you want to love on me with some flowers, try ranunculus. Now we’re talkin’, sweet darlin’.
My idea of Valentine torture is to make me fight the crowds and dress up for an overpriced meal that is going to be overcooked and underwhelming. The restaurant will be running late, and we’ll have to elbow our way to the bar for a glass of water while we wait. Did I put on Spanx for this? No, no. For real romance, let’s throw something on the grill, curl up on the couch for a DVR-ed episode of Downton Abbey, and go to bed early. For actual sleep. He’ll have me
snoring purring like an old lady without her dentures by nine-thirty.
Do I sound prematurely ancient? I have stopped fighting it. Jesus loves me. My mister loves me. We’re good. The fact that the neighborhood felines line up at the front door to try to sneak in and cuddle should probably cement my fear of one day becoming a senile cat lady, but, for now I’m embracing who I am (and running and screaming in terror every time one of those cats actually makes it past my front door, but more on my fear of kittens another day.)
I love a mason jar. I will put almost anything in one, and my fridge is full of them. I love me some classic lit. I could curl up on a couch with books for days, if you let me. I like CS Lewis and John Piper. I want to DVR CBS Sunday Morning (that’s a news magazine show, for those of you who are younger than sixty and have no idea what I’m talking about), and watch it after church. If I’m home, no doubt, I’m wearing my yoga pants, even though I’ve never been to a yoga class in my life (wearing tight fitting clothes and pretending to be bendy at very awkward angles in front of other people is kind of my worst nightmare). If I’m not at home you can be sure I want to be home, wearing my yoga pants. Networking and social parties with a bunch of strangers are my worst nightmare (I was being dramatic about the yoga class earlier… but it’s definitely in my top five).
Does any of this sound familiar? Have I lost you altogether? If you gear up for V-day by watching The Notebook every day for two weeks, you always want Feb 14 reservations for two at a high-falutin’ fancy place, and you expect to get a dozen red roses and a Whitman’s Sampler… I’ll love you anyway and I hope we can still be friends.
If there’s anybody out there who, like me and my cousin, Jule, prefers a good foot rub in her old wool socks, and maybe a glass of wine and a good ol’ classic, we’ve put this list together for you. Ten little treats that say R-O-M-A-N-C-E to ladies who love vintage books, history, and housecoats. Wait, no housecoats? It’s okay. No one’s perfect.
1. Smencils ($13)
Gourmet-scented, colored pencils. Yes, Indeed. I bought these for my nieces at Christmastime and fell in love. Waffle-Cone (brown) and Juicy Melon (pink) had me wishing I could keep them for myself. I can neither confirm nor deny that I already bought myself a pack to keep at Tia’s house. You know, for when the kids come over. ($13 for a pack of 10.)
2. Awesome, stress-relieving, Coloring Books ($4-10)
There’s this paisley one ($4). Indie Rock ($10). And for the nerdy girl who is going through a break up, there’s this little gem. I’ll bet you didn’t even know that Unicorns Are Jerks ($7). It’s the cold, hard, sparkly truth.
3. Libros ($15+)
Direct line to a nerd-girl’s heart. Give her a good book or two and she will swoon. Several options, here. Any hardcover, clothbound of a favorite classic, printed before 1970-ish, and preferably not part of a series, from Abe Books. Find her a good copy of To Kill A Mockingbird or The Song of Hiawatha. Her heart will flutter and she’ll get sweaty palms.
If you are a little less nerdy and prefer new to old, these Everyman’s Library Hardcover Classics are my favorite editions. They’re beautiful, sturdy, and fit perfectly in your hand for a good, cozy read. Available on Amazon starting around $15.
5. Yes, I’m Actually Reading This Bookmark Pad $6
So she can stop using torn, little pieces of paper to hold her place, she won’t have to worry about losing them, and they’re humorous. Win-Win-Win
6. Moleskine Notebook $12
It’s classic. It’s pretty. Red or Black. We love them.
7. Massimo Dutti, Crossbody Leather Handbag On sale for $120
8. Kymera Magic Wand, Remote Control $60
Where are my Harry Potter peeps? Are you completely geeking out over this? Can someone please get this and tell me if it really works!?!?
9. Polaroid 10-Megapixel Instant Print Digital Camera Z2300W with ZINK Zero Ink Printing Technology, White $180
Nostalgic and fun. Like taking a photo booth with you. Everywhere.
10. Scratch-Off Mini Wall Map $20
For the girl who travels. Or the girl who dreams of travel.
**What do you think about the list Jules and I came up with? What are your favorite nerdy Valentine treats? Did I forget something?**
This is Juliana. She is my baby cousin. Don’t let her gorgeous fool you, though. She’s got a nerd girl deep down in her heart. Also, she loves to come over and taste whatever hippy dippy concoction I’ve come up with, and she always tells me it’s good. I love her. Jules and I stayed up way too late curating our list for this post.